Six days in a row!

Well... the exhaustion that most of the Tres Dias family must have felt on Monday finally hit me!  I explained to a friend that I am wonderfully exhausted - he could not quite figure that out!

This morning I had to get some help from my Study Bible to catch the nuggets that I missed in reading on my own.  I'm not sure if I should jump to an 'easier' section of the book, or stick it out and use the resources at hand.  My history has been to jump to the New Testament because it's much easier, but then again this is not the old me!  I'll stick it out and use this as an opportunity to find good resources to help.

This morning I am reading Genesis 32-36 (the chapters where Jacob & Esau make peace with each other, and then through until the story of Joseph begins.) With help, I found three big take-aways:

1.  When all hell breaks loose and you're really scared, go to God!  This has been the familiar theme all week - go to him in all circumstances, ask for help, and then get out of the way.  Jacob had really messed over his brother and was scared that Esau would literally destroy him.  Rather than prepare for battle, Jacob asked God for help and found a peaceful way to resolve the situation.  God had also worked on Esau's heart, and they had a joyful reunion.

2.  Persistence pays.  I struggled with the story about Jacob wrestling with God - this is one to come back to later and find more help!  My study bible  points out that God rewards persistence, and that strong character develops through persistence.  I think about people who persistently pray for someone, never giving up despite the seeming lack of progress.  There may be situations that I never see resolved, but it is my job to continue to love and pray, and know that God is in control.  This is an area that I need to work hard to improve.  It is my tendency to start strong, but then become distracted by another 'shiny object' and forget the original issue.  Please, Lord, help me to improve in the area of persistent prayer.

3.  Character can change over time, and time apart from each other (and with God) heals many wounds.  Jacob did some terrible things to his brother, but time away from each other made them realize that family was more important than things. Holding a grudge is not helping me heal, nor is it what God wants me to do.  My job is to ask God for help with forgiving the person who harmed me, and to ask forgiveness for those whom I have harmed. So many people have stories of incredible abuse and pain.  I have been fortunate to not have experienced the extreme pain suffered by many of my sisters, and yet I cannot seem to come to grips with forgiving something that caused me no physical harm.  Help me, father, in this area of my life.

This was a tough day to write, but I am committed to practice persistence and not let the fire dwindle! Another day started with Daddy God - thank you!